Divorce & Remarriage: More Love Story


This excerpt from Waiting for Elizabeth, while not exactly about

divorce & remarriage

is about divorce and reconnection.

By late 2001:

“Elizabeth and I had been living very separate lives … for five years but somehow that pattern had begun to break. … Occasionally she would meet me after work for a quick supper and a DGA screening. A few times we had dinner in neighborhood restaurants. A thaw was evolving in our (non) relationship. But I held a tight rein on my hopes.

“I didn’t learn this until quite a while later but the 9/11 event was a major factor in Elizabeth’s revised attitude about our being together. I’ll let her tell you:

“For the world, the attacks on the WTC on September 11, 2001 were traumatically shocking; for New Yorkers, they bordered on the inconceivable. What happened here?! I was among thousands of the dazed walking north from midtown to the sound of Jet Fighter Planes flying over the city relentlessly. Very strange and ominous. However weird though, this shock offered each of us the opportunity to hold life in a brand new perspective. What’s really important to me; moreover, who’s really important to me? I wanted to gather all the people I loved to my heart, to my life. Most prominent among this group was Ben. I had to address this.

“By … April ’02 Elizabeth and I were seeing each other with some regularity: dinners, movies but we were always in public places. She never (thankfully) came to the penthouse and I didn’t go to Wendy’s apartment with her. I was being very cautious because I felt in my bones that the possibility of a reconnection existed and I didn’t want to blow it by being pushy in any way. However sometime in that period I mentioned the fact that we were never truly alone with one another and felt that we might consider some way to remedy that situation. Much to my surprise – and inner delight – she didn’t torpedo the idea. And I didn’t push for an immediate response, just let the idea sort of saturate the space between us.

“Then a couple of weeks or so later with my heart in my mouth I floated the bodacious idea that we should go somewhere together for a few days. Again, joyous surprise; she didn’t grimace and shudder. I suggested a few days in Puerto Rico, we’d had a nice vacation there once.  She didn’t freak out but sensibly suggested that if we went that far and things were not in synch… I had to agree so I let some time go by then suggested a weekend at a B&B in the Berkshires. This idea was met with seeming acceptance.

… I made the reservations for the inn and the car and the next day she decided that if things went sideways she’d be “walking down the Taconic parkway” and called it off. …

“It had become clear that the only way this was gonna happen was in a very nice Manhattan hotel. Very nice Manhattan hotel rooms in 2002 were upwards of $500 a night and I was making ends meet but without a lot left over. But I would have spent that much anyhow on a car and a B&B so it was doable. Then I had a brainstorm. My friend Jim Bates was then working for Helmsley Hotels and he came through with a room in the Park Lane Hotel on Central Park South with a king size bed and a spectacular view over the treetops for two-hundred bucks.

Divorce & Remarriage with a view

Divorce & Remarriage with a view

“At 1:15 PM on Saturday June 8th I picked up Elizabeth in a limo with roses and champagne. (I’d also packed a CD player and small speakers so we’d have our music in the room.) She didn’t know exactly where we were going, only to a hotel. We took a cruise around Central Park and pulled up in front of the Park Lane at 1:45.

“She was pleased.

“I was pleased.

“A little later on we both were pleased.

“Thus our long and painful separation ended in a warm and comfortable way.”

For more inspiring tales of divorce & remarriage – not to mention video production and editing – click here to get Waiting for Elizabeth.

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